Number 50

Number 50

Around this time ten months ago I hit the publish-button in WordPress and there it was: my very own blog. Online for everyone to read. Nothing and no one to hide behind, only me and my words suddenly out there in the open. Fast forward ten months and here I still am, now publishing blog post number 50.

Starting a blog was by no means an easy thing for me. I literally got nauseous with fear every time I published something. But there was something bigger than my fear inside me and that was my longing to share myself and my truth from an open, honest and vulnerable space. No facades. Just me, carving out a little piece of internet-space for myself, standing in the middle of it and making my voice heard. It was the first time in my life I had done anything like this and it was (and sometimes still is) a pretty scary thing to do. But something inside me just felt that it was time. Time for me to show up.

I connected a Google Analytics account to this blog so from the beginning I could see for example how many people were reading this blog and from which countries they were coming from. I have felt, and still feel, quite ambivalent towards this. Because it very quickly can become an ego-thing for me. Like: look at me, how many page views I get. How many likes on social media. How many comments. And that is exactly a space where I don’t really want to go. Because I write for myself simply because I love writing so much. The fact that I choose to publish what I write is just because I find it a great thought that someone, somewhere, somehow might be touched by something I write. If only one person finds something positive or inspiring in what I write, it is worth it for me to publish my writing instead of keeping it to myself.

Ego aside, of course it makes me really happy to see that so many people visit this blog and take time in their lives to read it. I love it when people comment and choose to share this blog in their circles. The photo for this blog post says: How we live is what makes us real. By writing this blog I share with you parts of how I live and with that I hope to give something real to you, in the midst of a lot of noise around us…

Over the course of the past ten months I have written about many things: romantic love, taking a timeout in Spain, meditation, being a teenage parent, alcohol and feminism for example. But also topics such as being angry, feeling low, growing older, being powerful and starting my own company. I have made my fellow-counseling-students laugh when I read in front of the group about how Sweden feels like Westworld. And never before have so many people contacted me to apologize for not getting in touch after reading my post connecting is a two-way street (even though it wasn’t them I had in mind when I wrote that piece).

So I hereby want to take the opportunity to say to all of you who are reading this: Thank You! I’m really happy that you choose to return to this blog and read what I write. Thank you for your comments, shares and likes. Facebook keeps spamming me with messages like: Pay x amount of money and you will reach x amount of people. I will not do this. Instead I trust that this blog reaches the right people in the right time. And apparently you’re one of them right now, in some country on earth in this universe. How cool is that?

…up to the next 50!

Photo: Annie Spratt – unsplash.com


Next post:
Previous post:
Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published.